SeuZlebelia SemCneuli ar gyavdeT. gldanis lomisis saxelobis wmida giorgis
eklesiis ezoSi, naZvis ZirSi zis xSirad. naTreobis kvali imdenad emCneva,
is mokle kaba romc ar Caicvas, mainc miujdebi da etyvi: _ saidanRac
mecnobi, xom ici?! is gagicinebs (ukana kbilebi gafuWebuli aqvs),
xels dagadebs muxlze da kai oxeri iqnebi Senco, getyvis. mere mzesumziras
aaknawunebT da roca laparakiT daiRlebiT _ masTan midixarT. is gldanSi
cxovrobs; meore mikroraionis dasawyisSi, erToTaxiani bina aqvs naqiravebi
da Sennairi stumrebic iq midian. roca Sexval (Tu pirvelad xar), gagikvirdeba
sxva kaci rom dagxvdeba sawolze gaSotili, magram is kaci Cumad midis.
Tu male waxval, ho-kargi, Tu Rame darCi kidev, is kaci Cumad Semodis
da erTi bewo samzareuloSi (yavlaSvilis proeqts patara samzareuloebi
aqvT) wveba taxtze. Sen albaT hkiTxav nesis, vinaao da gogoc gipasuxebs
_ Cemi yofili sayvareli! Turme is narkomani iyo, mere wamals Tavi daaneba da galoTda, magram
RviZli iseT mdgomareobaSi hqonia, sisxls aRebinebs. xolo koWlobs imitom,
rom avariaSi mohyva da xis Tu plastmasis fexi aqvs. roca ameebs giyveba
nesi, Sen Tvli, rom gewuwuneba. gadawvdebi iatakze dagdebul Sarvals,
amoiReb fuls da gadaRrecil tumboze Camodeb. nesi gadmogxedavs da marTla
brazdeba. aiRe! _ getyvis da dgeba _ me mivdivar, Tu ginda darCi! Sen, ra Tqma unda, ar rCebi, is ki samsaxurSi midis. nesi jixurSi muSaobs gamyidvelad. mgoni oTx lars uxdian, magram rva
laramde gamoudis dReSi. jixuris mepatrone kmayofilia misiT, radgan
bevri klienti hyavs, Tumca, yoveli SemTxvevisaTvis, profilaqtikis
mizniT, samuSao dRis bolos, gagdebiT emuqreba xolme nesis (magram
am ukanasknels kargad esmis muqaris mizani da mSvidad ismens da itans
Seuracxmyofel sityvebs). is rva lari,
rasac Soulobs, maincadamainc ar hyofnis nesis, radgan, jer erTi, koWli
unda Seinaxos, mere koWlis moxuci mamida, mere sakuTari Tavi da mere
zogierTi Sennairi, romelic saxlSi wasasvlel fuls sTxovs, magram, miuxedavad
amisa, nesi arasodes iRebs siyvarulisaTvis fuls. da albaT
amitomacaa Cven bevrni rom varT, Torem nesisTana qali male mosabezrebelia,
radgan sawolSi maincadamainc ver iCens Tavs. mTeli dRis namuSevari,
dagiwveba Tu ara, blitavs Tvalebs da ise male iZinebs, gikvirs, cudad
xom ar gaxdao. Tu ukve icnob, SeiZleba Segecodos da ar gaaRviZo, Tu
ara _ mujluguns hkrav, xelmeored gadaawvebi da cota brazianic Tu xar,
aiZuleb gauCerebliv ilaparakos. is marTla ilaparakebs, SeiZleba uazrod,
magram mainc ilaparakebs da mere Sen CageZineba. diliT ki, Zalian
diliT, nesi wasulia. tumboze werili devs _ saocari vinme xaro da wasulia.
Sen (Tu ar ici, rom yvelas amas eubneba) gaifuyebi da amayad mimoatareb
oTaxSi Tvalebs. pirvelad, SeiZleba borotma azrmac gagielvos _ SeiZleba
gadaaqoTo iqauroba da rame fasiani eZebo, magram meored arafris didebiT
ar izam amas, meored, piriqiT, SeiZleba sadme kuTxeSi miagdo fuli
da waxvide, magram erTi, rac cxadze cxadia _ es sawoli Segiyvardeba.
arada, arafriT gansxvavebuli sawoli araa. rkinis Zveli, zambarebiani
sawolia, romelzec matrasic ki ar agia.
pauza
am monakveTis
dawera, ra Tqma unda, azradac ar mqonia ukanasknel wuTamde, sanam
nacnobma sofikom, pirSi ar miTxra simarTle. da mainc, vecdebi naklebad
gulaxdili viyo: e.i. avadmyofoba
damewyo (ara, mTlad avadmyofobas ver davarqmev imas, rasac Cemi fsiqologi
nevrozs eZaxis). daaxloebiT ori wlis winaT, mas Semdeg, rac fexsacmeli
maCuqes. fexsacmeli sakmaod kargia (is axlac maqvs Senaxuli, rogorc
nivTmtkiceba) dasavleTevropuli romeliRac qalaqis, romeliRacAcnobili
firmisa. fexsacmeli odnav naxmari iyo da Tumca garegnulad mSvenivrad
gamoiyureboda, mainc iyo erTi ram, ramac kai ori-sami Tve (sanam sabolood
SeveCveodi) fexi matkina. am fexsacmlis Zveli patroni quslebs SigniT
cveTda, me ki piriqiT _ gareT vcveT! aman ki, rogorc vTqvi, fexi matkina,
magram imasTan erTad, rom mec SigniT daviwye quslis gacveTa, sxva
seriozuli cvlilebebic damewyo. I cvlileba:
_ cxviri gaRunuli mqonda marcxniv, axla maqvs marjvniv. II cvlileba:
_ saxe da tani damimrgvalda, xSirad vifurTxebi. III cvlileba: _ samarSruto taqsSi
adre vjdebodi marcxniv, axla vjdebi marjvniv. IV cvlileba:
_ gansakuTrebul siamovnebas maniWebs sibinZureSi amosvra da mere banaoba.
xandaxan, dabanvis win, ezoSi Cavdivar, talaxSi gavgord-gamovgordebi
da mere aTmagi siamovnebiT vbanaob. V cvlileba:
_ deda ufro Semiyvarda, vidre mama. vcdilob mamaze aRarc vifiqro,
viTom gamonagonia... VI cvlileba:
_ locva daviwye qalur xatebTan. da VII da
umTavresi cvlileba, romelzec qveviT ufro dawvrilebiT visaubreb. VII da umTavresi
cvlileba: WamaSi (Sesabamisad seqsSic) Zalian pretenziuli viyavi,
magram es pretenziuli damokidebuleba qalTaA sqesisadmi calmxrivad
Seicvala. sakmarisia qali, Tundac (fuh!) binZuri da Seuxedavi, kargad
Cacmuli, karg manqanaSi, ZvirfaseulobebiT Semkuli davinaxo, maSinaTve
aRvigznebi da aRgznebuli var manam, sanam Tvals ar movaSoreb an survils
ar davikmayofileb. am cvlilebam ganapiroba is faqti, rom Zvel partniorebs
(nawilobriv) davSordi da Zieba davuwye axal seqsualur obieqtebs. yvelaferTan
erTad, aRmovaCine, rom Turme materiaSi imaze meti sulieri mJRavndeba,
vidre Cven gvgonia da rom yvelaferi amaRlebuli, TviT xelovnebac ki,
SeTxzuli da araraobaa imdenad, ramdenadac yvelaze metad materialistebi
xelovani xalxia. maS ra aris
WeSmariteba? _ WeSmariteba isaa, rasac Seni goneba miwvdeba, anu is,
rac Sen g-goni-a, rom WeSmaritebaa, radgan, sabolood, WeSmariteba
mainc viRacis gamona-goni-a; aqedan gamomdinare, gadavwyvite Tavi
damenebebina materializmis yvelaze SeniRbuli da mdabio formisTvis
_ werisTvis da fulis Sovna damewyo ramenairad, nebismieri sxva saSualebiT.
amasTan, davrwmundi, rom mecnierulad moazrovne goneba bevrad saRia,
vidre mistikurad da transcendenturad momuSave tvini. TviT religiac
ki, verafriT acda materias, radgan Cveni azrovneba, deda-miwis-euli
azrovneba, xat-saxeebis gareSe ver wvdeba ze-grZnobads. aqedan gamomdinare,
xatebi imitom Seqmna adamianma, rom Sefarulad sces Tayvani materias,
an imitom, rom sinamdvileSi, is xati marTlac RvTiuris materialuri
gamovlinebaa. aqedan daskvna: _ mater(laT. deda)ialisturi da idealisturi
msoflmxedveloba erTi da igivea, orive erTad ki, imaze maRali ar aris,
vidre erTi ubralo vaSlis xea. Cemi mini
dosie: davibade azrovnebiTi verZis wels, 25 ivniss, TbilisSi, rkinigzis
samSobiaroSi. bavSvobaSi rame seriozuli travma ar gadamitania. var
dediserTa. vswavlob universitetSi, sabanko-safinanso fakultetze. Cemi
fsiqologis azriT, maqvs gandidebis maniis (megalomania) ukanaskneli
faza. midrekileba maqvs suiciduri aqtisken, alkoholisken, narkotikebisaken.
gamZafrebuli maqvs siamovnebis miRebis survili. gamovirCevi maRali
emociurobiT. mokled,
esaa is monakveTi, romlis dawerac me Zalian ar mindodasaviT!
II nawili
Cemma didi
xnis unaxavma megobarma, valerim gamomiara swored maSin, roca ubanSi
videqi, vifurTxebodi, manqanebsa da qalebze vlaparakobdi da uzomod
msurda gamdidreba. wavediT, ludi da arayi davlieT da radgan am dros
ufro mZafrdeba Sinagani Tu qvenagani grZnobebi, qalebi mogvinda. valeris
scodnia erTi, romelic `besproblem~ iZleva da iqeT mogvcems fuls Tuki
vTxovTo. _ oRond,
Sen SeiZleba ar dagevasos, iseTi araa ra... fuls Tu
momcems, kaSeisac vixmar-meTqi da wavediT. karebi koWlma
gaaRo da SegvipatiJa. davsxediT da nesic gamovida. dabali da gamxdari
gogo iyo, ase ocdaori wlis. saxeze imdeni raRac esva, ver gavarCie
Zalian maxinji iyo Tu ara, amitom valeris vaniSne, wava-ra-meTqi. valerim
Tavis megobrad warmadgina da koWls uTxra, eseni davtovoT, guramis
raRac saqme aqvs da marto laparaki undao. koWli nesis miubrunda da
ramden xanSi davbrundeo, hkiTxa. nesim me Semomxeda da mxrebi aiCeCa. _ erT-or
saaTSi ra! _ vTqvi da valeris Sevxede, romelic ukve karebSi idga.
_ manqanas
davayeneb da amoval! _ miTxra da gavida. roca valeri
dabrunda, nesis ukve kargad vicnobdi da axla me davelode. gamovidnen
da Cemze hkiTxa qals, ha, rogori Zmakaci myavso. nesim Zalian kargiao.
Sen yvelaze egre ambobo, gaecina valeris. aba, maSin raRas mekiTxebio,
gaecina nesisac da yavis mosaduReblad gavida. _ vale, is koWli vin
iyo? _ a, erTia
ra! nesi inaxavs. _ qmari
xom ar aris? _ ra-vi,
SeiZleba. es ambobs arao. magasTan problemebi ar aris. ise, mogewona? _ laxankaa,
magram gaWir... nesi Semovida. _ nesi,
muSaob kide? _ ki, Ramis
smena var. _ isev iqa
xar? _ ara, iqedan
wamovedi. aqve var metrosTan. _ sxvagan
gadasvlas xom ar apireb? _ binidan? _ xo! _ jer ara
mgonia, xazeikasTan problemebi ara maqvs, Tu mezoblebma ar miCivles. _ mezoblebs
ra undaT? _ mainc,
xom ici, biWebi rom modian... _ icode,
Tu sadme gadaxvedi, damireke! Cemi nomeri xo giweria? _ ki. _ hoda damireke. _ ki, dagirekav,
magram ara mgonia jer-jerobiT sadme wavide. _ ai, guramasac
magrad moewone da egec mova xolme. _ marTla?
sasiamovnoa! wamosvlisas
ori lari esesxa valerim, benzins Cavasxamo da wamovediT. _ egre or-ori
larobiT, kai asi lari maqvs gamorTmeuli. da ki ar mTxovs xolme, Steri
gogoa magari, mara, ise alalia, eg Cemisa! xo egeTi waklaa, mara alalia...
arc fuls iRebs, araferi. _ ra ar
iRebs, kargi, ra! aba, aslariani mieci, Tu ar aiRebs! _ exla aslariani
ar vici, mara bevrs SeuTavazebia fuli da ar iRebs, ar mindao. _ saCuqrebs? _ sa-Cuq-rebs...
ra-vi, aba! albaT! me erTxel samlariani duxi mivutane da ise gauxarda,
TiTqos diori iyoo. mere, is sami lari isev ukan wavarTvi, mara sul
imas ambobs, Sen ro duxi momitane da Sen ro duxi momitaneo. _ biWo,
eg cotas xom ar uberavs? _ ra vici...
araa! rame Seatyve? _ ara, araferi.
ise magari banZia. amdeni kaci Tu hyavs, rame ver iswavla?
_ mZoriviT egdo. _ xo, egeTia!
mec ver vigeb rodis aTavebs xolme. _ patara
gogoa da ukve eseTi gabanZebuli. eg verc gaTxovdeba. _ ra ver
gaTxovdeba, iraklas naTesavi roa, sofleli roa, xviCa... _ ho! _ eg xviCa
gvyavda magasTan, daavaJkaca da im debils ar Seuyvarda, to?! atexili
iyo, colad unda moviyvanoo. _ mere? _ ra mere?
kidev kai, nesim TviTon uTxra uari, Tore is magrad iyo gagiJebuli. _ ho, ra!
magas egeTi goimi vinme Tu moiyvans! mere, meore
dRes ara da, mesame dRes, martom mivakiTxe nesis. koWli saxlSi ar
iyo da TviTonve gamiRo kari. rom daminaxa, gaexarda. saWmels Wamda,
Semwvar kartofils da mimipatiJa. ki mSioda, magram magasTan ra SemaWmevda
da ise davujeqi magidasTan. is dinjad da auCqareblad Wamda, Tan raRac
melodias RiRinebda da fanjridan iyureboda. magidaze gadavixare wylis
asaRebad, tafas gamovede da Zirs gadmovagde. kartofili daipna. nesi
daixara, xeliT akrifa, TefSze dailaga da Wama ganagrZo. me ucbad Semjavrda
is da gineba davuwye. nesis xma ar amouRia, Cumad morCa Wamas, Cumadve
aalaga da gverdiT oTaxSi gavida. raki gamosvla daigviana, SevakiTxe.
is iatakze ijda da radios usmenda. winaaRmdegoba ar gauwevia, roca
gaxda davuwye, magram ukanasknel wams gamomecala da vibanaveb da Semovalo,
miTxra. ar ginda banaoba, iyavi egeTive WuWyiani, rogorc xar-meTqi.
man ki mxrebi aiCeCa da ubralod, banaobis mere qaliSviliviT varo,
Tqva da damiwva. me veraferi gavige da gadavaweqi. momeCvena, rom
iseve RiRinebda, rogorc Wamisas, magram aRaraferi vuTxari. roca gaviRviZe,
Tmas imSralebda. ase, dauxatavi ufro kargi Sesaxedavi iyo. tuCebi
kertebiviT fermkrTali hqonia, Tvalebi ki _ nacrisferi. nabanavebi
ufro patara gogos hgavda da isev mominda. amjerad movefere. _ ratom
xar aseTi CaTlaxi? _ veCurCulebodi da vsunavdi. _ ara var
CaTlaxi, aseTi var! _ ambobda da Tvalebi ebliteboda. _ CaTlaxi
xar, CaTlaxi! metic, saSineli CaTlaxi da dampali xar, fuls rom ar
iReb da ase, ufasod rom aZlev yvelas! _ ara var,
ara var CaTlaxi, aseTi var! ucbad, raRacnairad
Semecoda da Tan SemZulda, rom marTla aseTi iyo da moferebas SeveSvi
da xalaTi gavxade. marTla qaliSviliviT iyo, usisxlo qaliSviliviT. ra qeni,
gogo, Sabis abazanebi miiRe-meTqi, vkiTxe, man ki ucbad moiwyina da
Tvalebi daxuWa. mivxvdi eZineboda da SeveSvi. sanam eZina, Sokoladi
da koniaki amovitane da erT filmsac vuyure. raRacnairi mSvidi Zili
hqonda, Rimiliani da rom vakvirdebodi, mec meRimeboda. mTeli sami
saaTi eZina, bolos daviRale da gavaRviZe. sawolSi mivutane, vifiqre
esiamovneba-meTqi, magram reaqcia ar hqonia, Cveulebrivad miiRo. _ koniaki
amovitane, davlioT! _ me ara
vsvam. _ aba, tyuilad
amovitane? dalev! _ kargi,
davlev, magram SeiZleba cudad gavxde da varwyio! adga; kartofils
wvavda, roca qvevidan dauZaxes. viRac ori biWi iyo. nesi Cavida. zevidan
vuyurebdi, raRaceebi uTxres, mere Cxubi dauwyes da Tan zeviT iyurebodnen.
me erTi gemrielad gadavafurTxe da Tavi Semovyavi. kartofili
Seiwva, daiwva, nesi mainc ar Canda. gadavixede da aRarc biWebi iyvnen,
aRarc manqana. dabla Cavirbine _ nesi arsad iyo._ magaT wayva eg CaTlaxi,
davaskveni da avtrialdi. saSinlad
Seuracxyofilad vgrZnobdi Tavs, damcirebulad, ase rom momeqcnen. ra
unda meqna? erTi piroba
mTeli saxli gadavatriale, iqneb rame Zvirfasi vipovno-meTqi _ araferi
iyo. mere vifiqre, kars davuketav da gasaRebs waviReb, gareT davtoveb
am siciveSi-meTqi da asec vapirebdi moqcevas, rom koWli movida. _ gamarjoba,
nesi ar aris? _ mkiTxa, samzareuloSi Sevida, Cemi SesaWmeli kartofili
SeWama, Cemi motanili koniaki dalia da Sokoladic zed daayola. aman
sul mTlad gamacofa da Saris modeba davuwye, magram is Zalian mSvidad
mpasuxobda; mere gverdiT oTaxSi gavida, miwva da miiZina. erTi saaTic
velode nesis da wamovedi. sam dReSi
isev mivakiTxe. ar daumalavs im biWebs ratomac wayva: _ ra vqna, Zalian
mTxovdnen da uari veRar vuTxari, Tan vifiqre Sen mainc albaT aRar
gendomebodao. me gavcecxldi.
Tavs ase rom isawylebda, aman ufro gamabraza da gineba davuwye. is
ar mepasuxeboda da amaze sul mTlad gadavirie da gavartyi. tirili daiwyo
da saabazanoSi Sevarda. naxevar saaTSi gamovida da bodiSi momixada;
nabanavebi qaliSviliviT iyo. _ ratom
ikeTeb Sabis abazanebs, ar gezareba? _ ar vikeTeb,
ubralod, banaobis mere egre var. _ bozi xar! _ ara, ara
var bozi, aseTi var! yovel dRe
davdiodi nesisTan. xan dReSi orjer, samjerac mivsulvar, roca guli
aRar miTmenda. am xnis ganmavlobaSi, erTxelac ar gamomirTmevia fuli. koWls ise
SeveCvie, misi TandaswrebiTac vwvebodi nesisTan. is ise mSvidad gviyurebda
xolme, TiTqos nards vTamaSobdiT. daveWvdi da nesis vkiTxe. _ ho, avariaSi
rac moyva, aRar udgeba, impotentia! _ ratom
acxovreb SenTan? _ adre Cemi
sayvareli iyo; mere avariaSi rom moyva, dakoWlda kidec da muSaobac
aRar SeuZlia. Tan, xnieri mamida hyavs Sesanaxi da Cven vinaxavT. _ e.i. Sen
inaxav?! _ ho, ra! _ da aq
rato rCeba? _ azrze
ara var. erTxel darCa da mere sul rCeba. Tu vetyvi midis, problema
ar aris. _ da Sen
ras Soulob imdens, rom mag maTxovarsac inaxav da mamidamissac? _ maTxovari
araa. me TviTon vexmarebi... Svidi lari gamomdis yovel dRe da gvyofnis. _ Sen debili
xar, Tu Tavs iStereb, Tu me maStereb?_ ratom? _ ra ratom?
viRac koWl impotents da mis mamidas inaxav da ise, arafrisaTvis? _ ra SuaSia
eg? Sen rom mTxovo, ar dagexmarebi? _ me me
var. me gxmarob da imitom damexmarebi. _ egre sxvebic
modian da... me problema ara maqvs. am dRidan
fulis Txovna davuwye. yovel dRe or-sam lars varTmevdi da yulabaSi
vyridi. mere ki, viTom dabadebis dRe rom aRvuniSne da Taiguli da Gucci
rash-i rom mivutane, sixarulisagan kinaRam gadairia. yvavilebi lamazad
Caawyo ramodenime larnakSi da mTeli saxli morTo, sunamos xmareba ki
ver moaswro _ meore dRes, mezobels Seutana dabadebis dReze. mixvda
rom mewyina, magram bodiSi momixada da amiT morCa yvelaferi. erTxel me
vkiTxe: _ Cven Tavs ar vicavT, nuTu ar orsuldebi? _ ara, ar
vorsuldebi, me verasodes davorsuldebi. TandaTan,
nela Wama viswavle. davsxdebodiT erTad da neba-neba vilukmebodiT.
mas odnav sasacilo da Tan Zalian seriozuli saxe hqonda, magram arasodes
seqsSi ar uaqtiuria. mere ki,
moulodnelad aRmovaCine, rom zurgze uzarmazari naWrilobevi hqonia. _ es ra
aris? _ es iaraa;
am iariT davibadeT me da Cemi da! ase gavige,
rom tyupiscali hyolia, oRond_ Cven mamiT varT mxolod erTni! da me
mamas gogo var!_ rogor Tu mxolod mamiT? maSin, rogorRa xarT tyupebi?
nesim gaicina da eh, veravin igebs da aRarc vxsnio. misi tyupiscali
monazoni yofila, Tavis patara biWTan erTad cxovrobs taZarSio. _ bavSvi
visia? _ eg ojaxis
patara saidumloa, romelsac ar gavTqvam. rodesme albaT mec taZarSi
waval... albaT! ucbad gamaxsenda
vinc iyo da nervebmoSlilma davuyvire: _ Sen erTi bozi xar, romelmac
bozobac ar icis! _ me bozi
ara var, me aseTi var!
_ mipasuxa mSvidad da gadabrunda. _ mismine,
nesi! ramdenime welSi, Sen ise daberdebi da dauSnovdebi, meti rom
aRar SeiZleba. _ mec vici
rom davberdebi, mere? _ mere da,
bozob _ bozob da fuli mainc aiRe, rom normalurad icxovro da siberec
normaluri gqondes. xom SegiZlia zogs mainc gamoarTva fuli, gamoiyeno
eg... dawyevlili saSo, romelsac SenarCuneba ar SeuZlia. xom SegiZlia,
Rame mainc aRar imuSao viriviT da metic, Cemnair maTxovrebs fuli ar
aZlio?! Sen ubralod ara xar normaluri, Sen... Sen raRac gWirs! _ ra vqna,
aba?! aseTi var! da me daviwye
imis garkveva, Tu ratom iyo is `aseTi~. aTasi rame wavikiTxe, aTas
vinmes velaparake, magram amomwuravi pasuxi veravisgan Sevityve. Tumca,
iyo ramodenime varianti, romlebmac damafiqres. I varianti fsiqoTerapiuli
skola `mencari~, i.f. ra aris meZaoba (prostitucia)? sayovelTaod cnobili
azria, rom meZavs sqesobrivi aqti ar siamovnebs. amas imiT xsnian,
TiTqos am saqmis profesiad gaxdoma aClungebdes maT. es ar aris swori.
isini, swored imitom xdebian meZavebi, rom `qaluri sisuste~ sWirT.
maT araTu ar siamovnebT aqti, uaresi, ver itanen, ezizRebaT, `cud~
saqcielad, sibinZured Tvlian. ufro sworad ki, ki ar Tvlian, ase ganicdian.
maT ar ician amis mizezi da naklulobis, arasrulfasovnebis kompleqsi
uCndebaT. es kompleqsi, aseve aracnobierad, dakmayofilebas moiTxovs
_ am sisustis gadalaxvas. gadalaxvis erT-erTi gza aris misi arSemCneva,
damtkiceba, rom igi nakluli ki ara, piriqiT, bevris sasurveli, sanatrelia.
amiT icxovrebs kidec da sakmaod kargadac. meZaobis gaWirvebiT axsna,
TiTqos xelmokleoba aiZulebs qalebs am gzas daadgnen, Zalian advili
uarsayofia, ganxilvad arc Rirs. is SemTxveva, razec Tqven mesaubrebiT,
martivi asaxsnelia: _ sazogadod, msgavs adamians aqvs arasrulfasovnebis
garkveuli kompleqsi + sqesobrivi cxovrebis SiSi. imisda mixedviT,
Tu am oridan romeli dominirebs, gamodian nesis magvari qalebi, an
qalebi, romelTac saerTod ar SeuZliaT sqesobriv kontaqtSi Sesvla. Tu
adamianSi (am SemTxvevaSi qalSi) arasrulfasovnebis kompleqsi sWarbobs
SiSs, maSin igi icxovrebs sqesobrivad, magram Tavisi kompleqsis wyalobiT,
erTi partnioriT dakmayofilebas verasodes miiRebs. xolo, Tu masSi SiSi
ufro metia, maSin igi saerTod ver SeZlebs intimur cxovrebas... ...SiSebi?
SiSebi, sazogadod, bavSvobidan modis, iq iRebs saTaves. II varianti givi alaznispireli
(ezoTeriki) me oriode
sityviT davamateb suliwmindiT mdidari sxeulis zogierTi Tvisebis Sesaxeb,
rom maTi upirvelesi simptomi, es Zlieri emociurobaa. ar axasiaTebT
sidinje (an cdiloben iyvnen dinjebi) uyvarT iumori, Rimili, sicili...
da Tu tirian, aqac normaze meti igrZnoba, vinaidan gadaWarbebulebi
arian tirilSic da sicilSic. raRa Tqma unda, aseTi pirebis sxeulSi
adgili aqvs suliwmindis sapirispiro velsac. swored es badebs maT cnobierebaSi
paradoqsul Semecnebasa da xSir SemTxvevaSi _ daqvemdebarebasac ki,
rac SesaZloa WeSmaritebis wvdomis gzac aRmoCndes. pirveli,
rac maT axasiaTebT _ esaa raimes gacemis unarianoba: _ Tanxis, nivTebis,
produqtebis, tansacmlis, magram es exeba, rogorc sagnebs, aseve piradi
sxeulis gacemas, amitom, mandilosani, romlis hipofizic metad gaatarebs
miwaSi tabuirebuli velis sixSireebs, iolad ixdis kabas ucxo mamakacebTanac
ki da misi gaSiSvlebuli sxeuli advilad dasamorCilebeli xdeba. vimeoreb:
qalis aseT saqciels irgvliv arsebuli velis momatebuli gamtarianoba
xsnis. aseTi mandilosnebi advilad eguebian sxvadasxva (ucxo) mamakacebTan
intimur siaxloves _ viTomc aq araferia! es maTi sulieri dakmayofilebis
mcdelobaa, Tumc, xSir SemTxvevaSi, qali mainc ver kmayofildeba mruSobiT,
radgan sxeulis fizikuri gacema ar niSnavs sxeulis sulier dakmayofilebas.
seqsualuri aqti, am SeTxvevaSi, warmoadgens mxolod da mxolod mcdelobas
daakmayofilos piradi qvecnobiereba da masSi kodirebuli simruSe. sacodavi
qalebi, me dRemde vamtyunebdi maT, (Tumca, es rodi niSnavs, rom mruS
qalebs pasuxismgebloba exsnebaT). III varianti Cemi megobris
interviu (23 wlis) gogosTan_ pirvelad rodis Sexvedi intimur siaxloveSi? _ 18-is
rom viyavi. zafxuli iyo. agarakze viyavi mSoblebTan erTad. iq megobarma
gogonam gamacno 30 wlis simpaTiuri mamakaci da mec cnobismoyvareobis
gamo erT saRamos, manqaniT seirnobis Semdeg, davnebdi. _ ra igrZeni
maSin? _ tkivilis
meti araferi. mere im kacs aRar Sevxvedrivar. naxevari wlis Semdeg
Cemma megobarma gamacno Tavisi mezobeli. is 20 wlis iyo, TbilisSi
binas qiraobda. Zalian Semiyvarda da erTi wlis manZilze vxvdebodiT.
swavla rom daamTavra, raionSi dabrunda. Zalian ganvicade da gadavwyvite
aRarasodes aravin Semyvareboda. ori Tvis Semdeg, yofili Seyvarebulis
Zmakacs miveci, ise! _ ras niSnavs
ise? _ (pauza).
Suri viZie yofil Seyvarebulze, magram me da is Zmakaci erTi-orjer
SevxvdiT da morCa! _ mere sindisi
ar gqejnida? _ ara, Tavs
damcirebulad vgrZnobdi. ramdenime Tvis Semdeg nacnobebTan gavicani
35 wlis, col-Sviliani, fuliani kaci. saxlSi gamacila manqaniT da mec...
miveci! _ am kacs
ramdenjer Sexvdi? _ samjer.
jer restoranSi mivyavdi, mere manqanaSi vSvrebodiT amas. _ ratom
wvebi kacebTan, fulis gamo? _ fuli arafer
SuaSia. xSirad, piriqiT, me wamiyvania restoranSi. minda da msiamovnebs,
yuradRebas rom maqceven, qalad rom mTvlian. _ am 5 wlis
manZilze, ramdeni kaci gyolia? _ albaT
Tormeti, magram dRemde yvelasTan normaluri urTierToba maqvs. _ orgazms
Tu ganicdi? _ ara, aravisTan
ar ganmicdia. albaT TviTon procesi msiamovnebs. _ asakovani
sayvareli Tu gyolia? _ ki, erTi
iyo 53 wlis. Zalian momwonda masTan yofna, bevr axalgazrdas jobda. _ ar mogbezrda
manqanaSi, an buCqebSi amis keTeba? _ ki, magram
ase ufro mZafri SegrZnebebi maqvs, Tan kacebs fulis xarjva ar undaT
sastumroze. _ gaTxovebaze
ar gifiqria? _ adre vfiqrobdi,
axla aRar. _ `kacebs~
Sen toveb Tu isini midian? _ kacebi
TviTon mtoveben. rac undaT, imas rom miiReben, aRar mirekaven. arian
iseTebic, romlebic xSirad mexvewebian. IV varianti Cemi fsiqologi
Tvlis: nesis aqvs
mkveTrad gamoxatuli eleqtras kompleqsi, romlis sublimirebasac is Tavis
meZaobiT cdilobs. am kompleqsis arsebobaze mianiSnebs is faqtic, rom
nesi xazgasmiT miuTiTebs `mamas gogoobaze~. amasTan, nesis Sizofreniis
niSnebic aqvs, rasac misi ucnauri saubrebi amtkicebs masa da elenes
tyupobasTan dakavSirebiT, kerZod is, rom isini mxolod mamiT arian
erTni (aqac dedis ignorireba). ranairad SeiZleba adamians dediT sxva
tyupiscali hyavdes? rac Seexeba imas, rom nesi fuls ar iRebs, esec
advili asaxsnelia: _ vinaidan nesisaTvis kacebi mamasTan Canacvlebaa
(e.i. nesi SenSi da SennairebSi uSedegod eZebs mamas), is, kacebs
(mamas), sxva qalebisagan (dedisgan) gansxvavebiT, uangarod unda emsaxuros
da seqsisTvis fuls ver gamoarTmevs. V varianti numerologis
ara, magram numerologiaSi garkveuli kacis azri: me, ra Tqma unda,
dabejiTebiT ver vityvi, rom Cemi mosazreba sworia, magram Tqvens mier
daxasiaTebuli qalbatonis cxovrebis stils, pirovnebas, xasiaTs, SesaniSnavad
xsnis numerologia. kerZod, Tqven ambobT, rom qals hqvia nesi da rom
es saxeli man TviTon dairqva. sruli, naTlobis saxeli ki aris nestani,
ara? kargiT, maSasadame, vcadoT orive saxelis gaSifvra: 4 5 9 1
1 4 9 n e s t
a n i SevkriboT
ricxvebi. gamovida 33. daviyvanoT es ricxvi erTniSnamde, miviRebT
6-s. eqvsiani ki harmoniis, silamazisa da ritmis simboloa. mfarvelobs
planeta venera. `eqvsianebi~
patiosani, humanuri, kacTmoyvare arsebebi arian. did interess iCenen
adamianebis mimarT. kargi sazogado moRvaweebi dgebian, Tumca maTTvis
ojaxi umTavresia. `eqvsianTan~
urTierToba sasiamovnoa, gawonasworebuli, momxibvleli da mosiyvarulea.
sakmaod damTmobia, magram gabrazebac SeuZlia. maT uyvarT sunamoebi,
yvavilebi, lamazi nivTebi. uxariaT, roca vinmes maspinZloben. idealistebi,
urTierTobaSi ubralo da araegoisturebi arian. mudam mzad arian gaWirvebaSi
myofT daexmaron. arakeTilsindisier adamians SeuZlia borotad isargeblos
maTi gulisxmierebiT. maT saerTod uWirT uaris Tqma. `eqvsianisgan~
SesaniSnavi eqimi, pedagogi, an gadia dadgeboda. es rac Seexeba naTlobis
saxels. axla gamovTvaloT is saxeli, romliTac yvela icnobs mag qalbatons: 4 5 9 9 n e s i gamovida
27. 2+7=9. `cxrianebs~ axasiaTebT axloblis siyvaruli, filosofiuroba,
keTilSobileba da misticizmi. mfarvelobs planeta neptuni. `cxrianebi~
Zalian mgrZnobiareni da STabeWdilebianni arian. sxvebze metad amJRavneben
axloblis siyvaruls (daakvirdiT, es Tviseba naTlobis saxelSic hqonda).
daCagrulebs, avadmyofebs, moxucebs sisxlismieri naTesavebiviT eqcevian,
ganicdian maT mdgomareobas. mokled, isini yvelaze humanurebi arian.
maTi mizania universaluri siyvaruli, sikeTis Tesva, urTierTgageba.
amasTan, minda giTxraT, rom `cxrianebi~ metad ucnaur sizmrebs xedaven.
maTi sizmrebi TiTqmis winaswarmetyveluria xolme, magram rac CvenTvis
ucnauria, `cxrianisaTvis~ is yoveldRiurobaa. maTTan yvela
ver urTierTobs. zogi eTayvaneba `cxrians~, zogs ki (ufro xSirad asea)
sZuls im usazRvro gacemis gamo, romelic mas SeuZlia. gasaTxovari `cxriani~
Tu advilad SeiZleba Seityuo loginSi, gaTxovilis cduneba TiTqmis SeuZlebelia,
Tumca idealuri colebi mainc ar arian, radgan mTeli maTi energia sxvebis
daxmarebaze midis. `cxrianebi~ umetesad iseT samsaxurSi gvxvdebian,
sadac adamianebis daxmarebaa saWiro, amitom yvelaze xSiri `cxriania~
`cxriani~-medda-pedagogi-gadia-religiuri moRvawe! yvelaze
didi nakli, rac cxrianebs aqvT, esaa yuradRebis gafantuloba da fulis
uyairaTod xarjva. isini Zalian guluxvni arian da fuli sWirdebaT mxolod
cxovrebis yofiTi mxareebis mosagvareblad da sxvebis dasaxmareblad.
andaza romaa: erTi Txilis guli cxra Zmam gaiyoo, SemTxveviT ar ukavSirdeba
cxrians. yvelaferi
es imisaTvis damWirda, rom meCvenebina TqvenTvis, rogoria nesi da
rogori iyo. e.i. Tu kargad gamovTqvam, nestansa da nesis Soris Tuki
raime sxvaobaa, gacemis mxarea gaZlierebuli. mTlianobaSi, albaT, karg
pirovnebasTan gveqneba saqme. da erTic,
sayuradReboa is faqtic, rom naTlobis saxelis planeta venera miTologiaSi
xorcieli tkbobisa da qorwinebis simboloa. Tu es planeta horoskopSic
aRmoaCnda, maSin SeiZleba am pirovnebam `gacema~ fizikur aspeqtSic
daiwyos. VI varianti Cemi nacnobi
diletanti astrologi mimtkicebs: rom nesis ar SeuZlia sxvanairad icxovros,
radgan is dabadebulia SegrZnebiTi Tevzis wels da mis horoskopSi planeta
venera da iupiteri ukve gulisxmobs, rom qali mzadaa fizikur samyaroSi
icxovros, siamovneba miiRos da rac SeiZleba meti gasces. misive azriT,
nesisagan SesaZlebeli iyo SesaniSnavi medda, an kargi monazoni damdgariyo. VII varianti am moTxrobis
damweris azri: marTalia, Cemi personaJi azRaprebs Txrobas da TiTqmis
sentimentalurad lamaz istorias gviyveba nesize, rogorc poeturi sulis
mqone, maxinj bozze, romlis mruSobac TiTqmis sikeTed aRiqmeba, me
mainc vfiqrob, rom am sakiTxisadami amgvari midgoma arasasurveli da,
cota ar iyos, saSiSicaa. Tavidan,
gurami TiTqos erTgvari ironiiT ixseniebs nesis, magram am ironiaSi
ukve igrZnoba dafaruli mokrZaleba, rac, dameTanxmebiT, tendenciurobis
pirvelwyaroa. diax, nesis guramiseuli da guramis mier mokvleuli Tu
gamokiTxuli pirovnebebiseuli Sefasebebi tendenciuria, Tumca amaze
pirdapiri miniSneba arsadaa. me vesaubre gurams am sakiTxTan dakavSirebiT
da am ukanasknelma, cota ar iyos, uxeSad mipasuxa: _ Tu me vtyuivar,
maSin Senc matyuara xar, radgan Seni gamonagoni varo. am sityvebze
gaicina da mivxvdi, rom gamomiWira, radgan Cemive SeTxzuli azrebiT
majoba. kargi, majoba
Cemive naazrevma da SeTxzulma personaJma, magram me, avtors, sruli
da kanonieri ufleba maqvs Cemi, sakuTari (Tundac mikerZoebuli) azri
viqonio nesize: nesi, ragindnairadac
ginda gaSifro, mainc bozia, erTi Cveulebrivi meZavi, romelic, SeiZleba
marTla ar iRebs fuls siyvarulisTvis, magram samagierod, dabejiTebiT
iTqmis, rom is egoistia. nesisTana
qalebi, rogorc wesi, `Secdenilebi~ arian, anu mudmivad msxverplis
rolSi aRmoCndebian xolme, magram es, ra Tqma unda, moCvenebiTia. is
imitomaa `msxverpli~, rom ase sWirdeba; ase ufro met siTbos, siyvaruls
da yuradRebas miipyrobs, miiRebs (gaamaxvileT yuradReba _ miiRebs)
da ara gascems, rogorc gurami da misnairebi (sazogadod, qal-vaJis
urTierTobaSi isedac kaci gaiRebs, Tu fiziologiuri kuTxiT vimsjelebT)! aseTi qalebi,
asakis momatebasTan erTad, mkiTxaobas da maWanklobas iwyeben. isini,
arc axalgazrda gogonebis `gamsxverplebas~ eridebian da xSirad, Teoriuladac
mSvenivrad amzadeben am ukanasknelT. maTTvis damaxasiaTebelia or WiqaSi
tirili da sevdiani sadRegrZeloebis Tqma, magram aravin ar grZnobs
materialur samyaroSi maTze laRad Tavs. isini, raRaciT, momparavebs
da vaWrebs gvanan. da miuxedavad maTi Tavaziani Rimilisa da gamoxedvisa,
neba ar unda misceT Semogexvion, Torem SeiZleba gaggudon. nesi da
misnairebi, cota fsiqikaSeryeulebi arian, Tumca arc guramisnairebsa
aqvT yvelaferi rigze! erTaderTi,
rac am gamokvlevebma Cvens urTierTobaSi Secvala, iyo is, rom yureba
davuwye, rogorc avadmyofs. is marTlac avadmyofi iyo, radgan Taviseburi
wesi hqonda wylis dalevis, puris kbeCis da Taviseburad irCevda xatebs,
romlebTanac unda eloca. yvelaze metad ki maocebda misi sizmrebi. me
maTi Cawera da Cems fsiqoTerapevtTan mitana daviwye. es ukanaskneli
sul ufro metad ganmtkicda Tavis mosazrebebSi, rom nesis eleqtras kompleqsi
hqonda da mec davijere misi sityvebi. ai erT-erTi sizmari, romelic
yvelaze metad ganicada nesim: vxedav unayofo miwas, romelzec marili
mouyriaT. am miwaze viRac mamakaci TiTiT raRacas wers da iRimeba.
me mivdivar da veubnebi, rom vicnob mas da vTxov eklesiaSi wamiyvanos.
is dgeba da CemTan erTad modis. roca saydarSi SevdivarT, xmamaRla
vyvirivar, rom es kaci mefea _ is qristea da vadgam gvirgvins, magram
xalxi damcinis. me mrcxvenia. vtirivar, magram ver gamovrbivar. meRviZeba.
sizmris
Cemi fsiqoTerapevtiseuli interpretacia:_ is faqti, rom nesi sizmarSi
kvlavac gvirgvindadgmul kacs xedavs, Cems varauds adasturebs. gvirgvindadgmuli
kaci _ mefe, simbolizirdeba mamasTan, romlisadmi libidoc qals aSkarad
didi aqvs. am SemTxvevaSi miwa _ qalis genitaliebTan, Tavad nesisTan
simbolizirdeba, romelzec kaci (mama) TiTiT (penisiT) wers (sqesobriv
kontaqtSi Sedis), magram nesis es ar akmayofilebs, is cdilobs saxalxod
icxovros mamasTan (saydarSi wayvanis survili), magram, amave dros,
mas SiSic aqvs am Tanacxovrebis amoralurobis (xalxis dacinva, am SemTxvevaSi,
super-egos winaaRmdegobaa)! rac Seexeba
imas, rom gvirgvinosan mamakacTan qristes saxelic figurirebs, aqac
Sefaruli simbolikaa _ nesi eklesiaSi loculobs qriste _ RmerTis (mamis)
winaSe. mokled,
davrwmundi, rom is avad iyo da Cemma pativmoyvareobam maiZula mis
mkurnalobaze mefiqra. me, ase Tu ise, ukve verkveodi fsiqologiaSi
da CavTvale, rom SemeZlo raRac meRona. pirvel rigSi, vecade yvelaferi
momeyolinebina, rac bavSvobidan axsovda. es sakmaod advili aRmoCnda,
radgan nesis mexsiereba 5 Tvis asakidan hqonda SenarCunebuli. me eWvi
Semepara am maxsovrobis realurobaSi da hipnozuri ZiliT vcade misi
Semowmeba. nesi advilad STagonebadi iyo, amitom ucbad gadavida hipnozur
ZilSi. Tumca aqedan imaze meti informacia ver miviRe, rac Tavad nesim
momiTxro. maSin vcade e.w. `mamis xati~ vinme konkretul pirze gadaetana
da mere am pirs misTxoveboda. vin SemerCia? yvelaze realur kandidatad
isev koWli mesaxeboda, Tumca aq erTma seriozulma problemam iCina Tavi
_ nesis gaTxoveba ar undoda. _ ai, ratom
ar ginda, aba? _ ar vici!
ubralod me ar SemiZlia erTi kacis viyo. an unda yvelasTan davwve,
an aravisTan. _ ver gavige,
ratom? nuTu ar SegiZlia ubralod gaTxovde da rogorc yvela normalurma
qalma ise icxovro? _ ara, ar
SemiZlia _ qmars ver vuRalateb. _ eg zRaparia.
Sen ukve Cvevad gaqvs bozoba da ginda, ar ginda, uRalateb, magram
mTavari eg ar aris, mTavaria amdenTan ar dawve, Torem erTxelac aikideb
rames da... _ Sen ratom
ar mogyavs coli? _ jer ra
meCqareba? ocdaerTi wlisa var! _ egaa mizezi? _ ki! (pauza)
ho, kargi, CemTvis Sesaferisi qali ar mipovnia. _ da rogoria
SenTvis Sesaferisi? _ unda iyos
yvelaze lamazi, saSualod Wkviani, erTguli, meojaxe. unda uyvardes
bavSvebi da, rac mTavaria, unda hqondes bevri fuli! _ da yvelaferi
eg erTbaSad? _ ki. _ eg xom
ramdenime qalia. da Tanac, Sen ra gaqvs? _ me? me
niWieri var... vswavlob sabankoze da potenciurad erT-erTi udidesi
saqmosani var, Tan, Tan... Tan raRaca maqvs iseTi, rac yvelasgan gamomarCevs. _ mainc
ra? _ ar vici,
egre ver vityvi, magram raRac aris, me vgrZnob amas. _ ee, me
meubnebi gaTxovdio da mgoni Sen darCe egre. _ me ar
davrCebi, Sen ki... ver xvdebi, dagexmaro minda. _ damexmaro?
maSin momiyvane colad, Sen wamogyvebi! _ ara, me
ver mogiyvan, mara, ai, vTqvaT koWli, riTia cudi saqmro? Tanac SeCveulebi
xarT, Tanac ar eWvianobs Senze! nesi siciliT
mokvda da amaze metad aRar gvisaubria. amasobaSi
me triperi avikide da nesisTan dawolas veridebodi. ai, rogor moxda
es: _ wveulebaze
gavicani Cemi klaselis coli, sakmaod lamazi, fuliani da saerTodac,
kargi xasiaTis gogo. rogorc ityvian, davkere da biZaCemis erToTaxianSi
triperiT davsaCuqrdi. nesis ukvirda
Turme, rom aRar vakiTxavdi. SemTxveviT SevxvdiT da momenatreo, miTxra.
roca gaigo, rac mWirda, bevri icina da im gogom ki ar gadagdo, Sen
Tavs TviTon akide eg daavadeba, ase Zalian rom giyvars fulio. mere
manganumiani wylis abazanebi gamikeTa, bebiamisis gakeTebuli raRac
balaxis wveni damalevina, Cems spermas akoca da ganmkurna. magram erT
kviraSi me mainc SeveSvi masTan siaruls. ubralod mombezrda, SemzizRda
da SeveSvi, Tumca samsaxuri verafrisdidebiT viSove, verc mdidari sacole
movnaxe da gabrazebul gulze isev nesisTan davbrundi Cemi boRmis, dardis
da materialuri energiis amosanTxevad, magram nesi iq aRar damxvda.
ubralod iq aRar iyo da morCa. a) yvavilebi,
sasmeli da saWmeli viyide da wavedi. xom ase SemzizRda TiTqos, magram
im wuTas raRacnairad mimixaroda masTan. kargi SeyvarebuliviT viyavi,
bednieris saxe mqonda da winaswar warmomedgina, rogor Semxvdeboda.
netav sxva kaci ar damxvdes da meti araferi minda-meTqi, vfiqrobdi
da roca warmovidgine, rom SesaZloa vinme yofiliyo nesisTan, eWvisagan
kinaRam gavTavdi. _ miyvars, dedas vficavar, miyvars! SeiZleba
colad ar moviyvano, magram egre qali ar Semiyvardeba. Cemi sacodavi,
bozi nesi! Tu, vTqvaT-da saxlSi ar iqneboda, warmovidgine, rogor Camovjdebodi
sadarbazos kibeze da davelodebodi. is, albaT, daRlil-daqanculi dabrundeboda.
sanam zed ar wamadgeboda, ver SemniSnavda (TavCaRunuli siaruli icis).
roca SemniSnavda, Sexteboda da daibneoda. vici, tirils daiwyebda da
akankalebuli Zlivas moargebda klites gasaRebs. Cven SevidodiT da saocari
wuTebi dagvidgeboda. is aRar iqneboda aseTi civi, vnebisagan gagiJdeboda
da metyoda: miyvarxar, mxolod Sen miyvarxar! me SevTavazebdi, bavSvi
aviyvanoT, erTad gavzardoT da Tqven Cemi patara saidumlo iqnebiT-meTqi.
is gaCumdeboda. me vetyodi: ara, colad ar momyavxar, _ ubralod bavSvi
viyolioT. me Cemi ojaxi meqneba, Sen ki, roca ginda, visTanac ginda
daweqi _ Sen xom egeTi xar! nesi tirils daiwyebda da ufro dauSnovdeboda,
magram me mainc meyvareboda _ is xom aseTi sacodavi da avadmyofuri
iyo! mokled,
avedi mexuTe sarTulze, davazare da viRac wels zeviT SiSvelma kacma
gaaRo kari. ucbad gavbrazdi Cemi sentimentaluri fiqrebis gamo da gavifiqre:
_ is xom bozia, erTi Cveulebrivi bozi, romelsac RmerTma uwyis ra awuxebs.
mere ra, rom fuls ar iRebs, is mainc bozia, bozi! da gabrazebulma
xeliT mivwie kaci da binaSi Sesvla davapire._ sad midixar, Zmao? _
mkiTxa dabneulma. _ sad mivdivar
da dedofals Tayvani unda vce! _ geslad viqeci. _ Sen xom
ar uberav, biWo? vina xar, amixseni? _ ra vina
var, nesisTan mivdivar. _ vin nesisTan? _ vinaa
nesi?! vinc aq cxovrobs. _ aq me
vcxovrob, Zmao da araviTari nesi aq ar aris! amasobaSi
viRac Casuqebuli qalic gamovida da ra xdebao, ikiTxa. me odnav ukan
davixie, sarTuli xom ar SemeSala-meTqi, magram ara _ sworad movsuliyavi. _ mapatieT,
magram am binaSi nesisTan movdiodi xolme, ai, koWli kacic rom cxovrobda
masTan, biWebi akiTxavdnen xSirad. _ rodis
modiodi? _ erTi Tvis
win viyavi bolos. _ ara, Zmao,
raRac geSleba namdvilad. meeqvse welia aq vcxovrob da araviTari nesi
ar viciT, am sadarbazoSi egeTi vafSe aravinaa. me misamarTi davasaxele.
sworad maxsovda. raRacnairad eWvi Semepara am kacSi, yvavilebi da
sursaTi mivawode da sanam is gons movidoda, binaSi Sevvardi. ara,
sul sxva bina iyo, sul sxva oTaxebi. diasaxlisi
ukve kioda, kaci ki ukan damsdevda gineb-ginebiT. me aRar Sevepasuxe,
egreve gamovvardi. saSineli
dRe iyo. b) valerim
gamomiara manqaniT da ludis dasalevad wavediT. nesisTan aRar dadixar-meTqi,
vkiTxe da gakvirvebiT Semomxeda. erTi Tvea ar mivsulvar da ubralod
mainteresebs-meTqi, vuTxari. valerim, mekaifebi, Tu ra ariso. ras
gekaifebi, misvla minda da mainteresebs isev iq cxovrobs, Tu ara-meTqi.
nesi mokvdao, miTxra. _ ra mokvda,
ras kaifob, seriozulad gekiTxebi. _ mec seriozulad
geubnebi, mokvda. ar gagigia? mTeli biWebi daSinebulebi varT, analizebze
davrbivarT ramdeni xania; me megona icodi! _ ra vicodi? _ raRaca
sWirda Turme da imiT mokvda. Sen uprezervativod xmarobdi? _ ho. _ hoda,
davai, xvalve wadi eqimTan, RmerTma dagifaros da rame ar gWirdes.
meore dRemde
ra gamaCerebda da biZaCemis klinikaSi gavvardi da sisxli Cavabare. wyeuli bozi! g) samsaxuri
rom ver viSove da verc mdidari coli moviyvane, gabrazebul gulze isev
nesis mivadeqi. fanjridan
koWli iyureboda. daminaxa, Tu ara, micno da erTi boTli arayi wamomiReo,
damiyvira. _ am xanigas
uyure, mec rom miyenebs! _ gavifiqre gabrazebulma da sirbiliT avirbine
kibeebi. karebi Ria iyo da Sevedi. saSineli suni idga. iatakze tansacmeli
iyo mimofantuli, viRacas talaxiani fexebiT uvlia da adRlamuzebuli
iyo iqauroba. koWli samzareuloSi ijda da sigarets eweoda. _ amomitane
arayi? me pasuxi
ar gaveci da saabazanoSi Sevedi xel-piris dasabanad. _ nesi sadaa? _ nesi?
oo, ne-si! hi, hi! nesis bozi dedac! eg xo qali ara yofila! _ ra iyo,
ra moxda? _ ra moxda?!
marTla ar ici? hi, hi! wavida nesi! _ sad wavida? _ sad wavida
da wavida eg bozi, CaTlaxi, dampali! monasterSi wavida. _ rogor
Tu monasterSi? _ ai, egre!
arc me mjeroda, magram egrea. werili gamomigzavna, aq kargad vgrZnob
Tavs, bodiSi rom migatove, magram riTac SevZleb, dagexmarebio. eg
axvari ega! ra gamikeTa, azrze xar? _ damRupa kaci. viRa marCens axla
an me, an mamidaCems? ra gavakeTo, ra? maTxovrobac rom ar SemiZlia? da tirili
daiwyo. _ kargi,
ho, nu wuwuneb! aha, gamomarTvi, am dReebSi kidev amoval da rames
amogitan! _ rac fuli mqonda, magidaze davugde _ romel monasterSia? _ ra vici,
aba?! Sen mainc momxede, Seni Wirime. vicodi, rom Sen erTaderTi xar,
vinc ar gagvwiravda me da mamidaCems, Sen Semogevle! da Zlivs moviSore. sadRa unda
meZebna nesi, romel monasterSi, an hqonda ki azri da gamovbrundi. _ Tu miagno,
uTxari, RmerTi gadagixdis samagieros-Tqo! iqneb aqamde CamomiTrio
eg kaxpa da mere me vici! mivubrundi da icinoda. koWli iyo! d) sasmeli,
yvavilebi, raRac-raRaceebi da misi sayvareli sunamo Gucci Rash-i viyide
da wavedi. korpusTan rom mivedi, axlobeli biWebi Semxvdnen da gamovelaparake.
sad midixaro, rom mkiTxes, nesisTan-meTqi, vuTxari. romel nesisTano
da ai, mexuTeze rom cxovrobs, koWlTan erTad-meTqi. _ magaze
ar gagigia? _ ra unda
gamego?! _ eg xo
dabrides, biWo! Turme erT-erTi
sayvareli policieli hyolia. am policiels kidev, col-Svili hyolia.
im colma, eWvianobis gamo, qmris ufrosTan uCivla nesis da daiWireso.
fuli sad hqonia im sacodavs da erTi saqmec (mgoni narkotikebis gayidva)
SeuteniaT da gausamarTlebiaT. cixeze viyaviT ramdenimejerme biWebi,
peredaCi wavuReT da gauxardao, miTxres. cixeSi viRac qals Seuyvarda
Turme (koWli yofila), orjer nasamarTlevi yofila, meored mkvlelobisTvis
mjdara. Seuyvarda Turme da Cemi coli iyavio, uTqvams nesisTvis. es
kidev, Turme yuradRebas ar aqcevda da eWvianobis gamo mouklavs im
patimars. _ mZinaresTvis
Caurtyams dana xuTjer. mTeli cixe tiroda, ise ecodebodaT sacodavi
nesio. komisariatas Zma roa, xo ici, badragad ro muSaobs, ai iman
mogviyva, ra! aravin rom
aRar miakiTxa micvalebuls, saerTo sasaflaoze daumarxavT da kacma ar
icis sadaa axla magisi saflavio. is yvavilebi viRac gamvlels vaCuqe,
Gucci Rash-i mezoblis bavSvs _ nestans. sasmeli kidev, iqve davlieT
da mere ori dRe vkvdebodi nabaxusevze. e) amaswinaT,
Cems axlad SerTul meuRlesTan erTad saerTo megobris dabadebis dReze
mivdiodi. metrosTan yvavilebi viyideT da roca iqve mdgar jixurSi Sampanuris
sayidlad SevediT, nesi davinaxe. wamiT gaiRima, magram Cems daseriozulebul
saxes rom Sexeda, Tavi daxara. rodesac gamovdiodiT, raRacnairad Semrcxva.
Sevbrundi da nesi, rogor xar-meTqi, vkiTxe. Tavidan, viTom ver micno.
mere, vaime, Sen rogor xar, rogor Secvlilxar, ramdeni xania ar minaxixar,
eg lamazi gogona Seni meuRlea, Svilic xom ara gyavs, sxva ras Svrebi,
muSaoba xom ar daiwyeo da a.S. damaxala kiTxvebi, romlebsac, colis
Tvalebs wamwydarma, mSralad da naZaladevad, ho-araTi vupasuxe da davemSvidobe. gamosuls,
meuRlem mkiTxa, vin iyoo da erTi Cemi megobris coli-meTqi. ra bozuri
Sesaxedaoba hqondao, dausva diagnozi da damakvirda. Cemda sasaxelod
unda iTqvas, rom arc ki gavwiTldi.
pauza.
sizmari
vnaxe matarebelSi: _ xalxis brbom airbina da Cairbina quCaze. mere
kacebi gamoeyvnen qalebs da bozs qvebi dauSines. mere dawynardnen
da RiRin-RiRiniT wavidnen. mere qalebmac, yoveli SemTxvevisaTvis,
erTi-ori qva daumates da isinic wavidnen. mere mec, xalxisagan mowyvetilad
rom ar megrZno Tavi, ukve mkvdars, patara kenWi vesrole da gaviqeci.
VIII da
sagulisxmo cvlileba fexSiSvela
davdivar.
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